I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize