Will you blow on my dice?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize