ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
