Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
