There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
