Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
