a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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