I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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