we have officially lost it.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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