Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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