i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
this boner is exhausting
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
