so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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