she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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