i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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