you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize