We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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