Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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