I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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