why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Randomize
