i don't like sucking hair
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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