I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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