Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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