We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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