Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
