Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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