Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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