And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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