I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
