I want to walk on stilts...naked
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
