The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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