that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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