Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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