i already hear my dad disowning me
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
