what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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