is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
