I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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