I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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