i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize