That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
