he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
we made out on top of his cat.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
