we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize