Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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