Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
