Please don't use social media to get back at me.
please come you make the beer taste better
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize