You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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