butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I've blown a few things in my day
no you cant smoke seaweed
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
