hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
