It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
