So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
