yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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